Can I just say (once again) what a great kid this guy is?
He is a pretty good kid. He gets good grades and doesn't fight me on doing his homework. He loves to read and can now read a Harry Potter book almost as fast as I can...we're talking just a few days.
He is a really great big brother, his brothers and sister look up to him and try to be just like him. He is willing to help me with the baby, even if it means holding her down while I try to put diaper rash ointment on her sore little bum. I thought I might lose him that time, but he squinted up his eyes and looked the other way and put all of his body weight into keeping her on the table (she is seriously strong for such a tiny little thing!).
One afternoon we went disc golfing and decided to play up in the woods where we don't normally go. Blake launched his disc and it hit a tree, bounced off and smacked into Sophie (she was sitting in the stroller in what we thought was a safe distance from where they were throwing). It didn't hit her very hard, but Chad and I both immediately went to check on her. I think she could tell by our reaction that she was supposed to be upset, so she screwed up her little face and started to cry. Chad got her out and easily comforted her, but I noticed that Blake was a little ways off from all of us with his hands over his face. Turns out, he was a lot more upset than we all were at the thought that he might have hurt his little sister. We calmed him down and showed him that she was fine. It really touched my heart to see that he has so much love and compassion
for her.
Blake has had a pretty rough year. Last year at about this time he was attacked by a dog at a missionary farewell. He still bears several scars on his back and is very skittish around big dogs.
He got his tonsils and adenoids removed in March, got smacked in the eye with a baseball last month and three staples in his noggin after an accident a few weeks ago during a football game at recess. He has learned to be pretty brave when it comes to pain, and has hardly cried during most of his ordeals.
He has had a large mole above his left ear for quite a long time. I really noticed it about a year ago when I gave him a short haircut because normally it is covered by hair. I decided to watch it and see what happened. I mentioned it to our pediatrician and he told me to watch it and if it continued to grow and change to take him to a dermatologist. When I gave him his haircut for the beginning of the school year I got very concerned when I noticed that it had gotten a lot bigger and was looking different from what it started out like. I made an appointment with the dermatologist, who took one look at it and said that it needed to come off.
She set up an appointment with a plastic surgeon since it is in his hair line and we didn't want a huge ugly scar that would be with him forever. When I took him in for the consultation the surgeon basically said that it was probably nothing, and it was up to me whether I wanted to have him remove it.
I told him that given the family history of both my father in law and brother in law having had skin cancer, I would feel better if it came off. He didn't fight me and scheduled the procedure.
The next few weeks I wrestled with self doubt. What if it really is nothing and I am putting the poor kid through another procedure that may end up being a waste of everyone's time and money? I prayed for guidance and Chad and I discussed the best course of action.
We decided to go forward with the procedure. Blake was such a rock, even though I could tell he was pretty nervous. The dermatologist told him that he would be put under general anesthesia for it, which he was fine with because he did that for his tonsillectomy. However, when we went to see Dr. Shack (the plastic surgeon) we were told that it would just be a local and that I could put some special numbing stuff on it that he prescribed (and that I had to go to two different pharmacies for...Boo Sam's Club for making me wait 45 minutes and then deciding to tell me you don't carry it!).
I am kicking myself in a huge way right now because I left my camera (and my cell phone) in the car so I never got a picture of the offending mole. Just suffice it to say that it was pretty large and noticeable. The nurse cleaned the area around Blake's ear and draped blue towels all over him so that only his little face stuck out. He had to hold perfectly still so nothing would shift and become un-sterile (spell check is telling me that is not a word...but I am using it anyway. Take THAT spellcheck!). Dr. Shack came in and worked his magic and less than twenty minutes later Blake had four stitches over his left ear. I might just have to go back to school to become a nurse because I watched the whole fascinating process from down by Blake's feet.
Blake was such a rock! He said it hurt when they put the numbing shot in, but otherwise it was no big deal. Both the nurses and the doctor told Blake that he handled the whole thing much better than the majority of the adults they take care of.
Here it is a few days later. Blake insisted on playing in his baseball game that night, so I had to put a gauze pad over it and wrap stretchy tape around his head. Forgot my camera then too...I am losing my touch!
Now for the part that makes my heart skip a beat when I think about it.
We were told to call one week later to get the results of the biopsy.
I called and received a call back from the nurse within about an hour. She sounded really serious and said, "He said to tell you that the mole was benign,
but [why is there always a 'but'?] there were atypical lesions in it."
I didn't know exactly what that meant, but from the tone of her voice and the fact that my heart started racing told me that it wasn't just nothing. She went on to tell me that they removed the entire mole so we didn't need to worry about it any longer, which is a relief I guess.
I Googled atypical moles as soon as I got off the phone and learned:
"An atypical or dysplastic (abnormal, irregular) mole or lesion are also known as atypical melanocytic hyperplasia, atypical mole, or dysplastic mole. The majority of these moles or lesions are benign (non cancerous). Some have a significant risk of actually being a melanoma or developing into melanoma. "
So basically it had a significant chance of becoming cancer in the next few years.
In my head I am freaking out.
He is not even 10 years old and that particular part of his body is generally covered by hair so it doesn't see much sun. What if I hadn't noticed it? What if I had ignored it and not taken him to the dermatologist? What if I had listened to the plastic surgeon and not had him remove it? There are so many what ifs here that freak me out, I can't begin to put words to them all.
In the end I am so grateful for the fact that I was guided by the Spirit to make the decisions that I did. The what ifs could eat me up inside, but I know for a fact that the Lord is watching over us and answering our prayers.
I have started reading a new series called "The Geat and Terrible" by Chris Stewart. I have really only just read the first book which centers on the war in Heaven. It talks quite a bit about how the Lord saved the strongest spirits to come to Earth at the Last Days to fight Satan when he is at his strongest. The last page of the book is about Satan surveying the Earth and seeing the valiant spirits that were saved to fight him. He called them the "Great Ones".
The last few paragraphs say:
"He laughed in his anger. He was ready for them. He was more powerful! Let them come with their Great Ones. He was Terrible now.
The Great and the Terrible had assembled.
Let the battle begin."
When I think about the trials that Blake has been through this past year, and how much stronger and more ready he is for the trials that will come, my heart aches for him.
He is a pretty Great kid.
I sure hope he knows how much he is loved by both his Heavenly parents and his Earthly family.
